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The hardest part about someone dying close to you is not the first or second month. It's usually 3-6 months later.
The little things that jarg your memory and you want to run tell that person something, or pick up the phone and call them, or call out their name with no response. It is not easy. It is a pain that each individual has to deal with on their own. Sadness, loneliness, guilt, anger, acceptance, forgiveness then moving on. It's a process.
You will not and are not expected to forget that person but someday you will go 24-48 hours without thinking of them. (And that is Okay!) Eventually (years later) you'll remember them just on certain occasions with fond memories and the pain will be less, I assure you.
A friend and I recently listened to a speaker talk who said death is not an end but a begining and that it is a process of life and that the spirt never truly dies. Our loved ones are just in the next room to us waiting for us to come in.
Barb if you are reading, there are some wonderful books available and I'm sure you will find all AZBers ready at your side should you need any assistance, please let us know.
Mike and Donna
04-21-2009, 09:06 PM
